CindyFrench-stranger than fiction stories

about facing life with hope and confidence, no matter the diagnosis

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15 May 2010

A New Book and a new Niece!

One of the books in my library is REES HOWELLS, INTERCESSSOR. I felt led to pick it up and read it this last week. I know I had read it 30 years ago, but this was like the first time! This is not a fast read, but a really deep, thought-provoking book. It has already changed my life as God spoke to me often while reading it. I found that there is a big difference between being a prayer warrior and an intercessor. An intercessor stands in the stead of the person being prayed for or for situation being prayed for–that is a really simplistic explanation. Anyone interested should read the book. I thought I had really been depending on God for all my needs, but this book really showed me I hadn’t! What a difficult lesson! I’ll be learning in the next month if I have gotten close yet! One of the most profound things was that if I have money to fill a person’s need and God says take care of it, it doesn’t matter if I will need that money later. I have to take care of the now. God will take care of the later.

I met my new niece today. Helena Scarlett was born on the 12th and is a tiny little girl, with long fingers and long legs. Her dad is 6’4 so I expect tall. Helena’s big sister Georgia is 4 but is as tall as my 5 year old granddaughter! What a lovely time I had with that family this afternoon. The grown children were out for the day, so just my brother, sister in law, and the 2 kids. It  was good catching up as I hadn’t been able to drive till the last couple of months. We teased my brother that here was a guy who thought babies were gross-now he has 5 kids! The good Lord has a great sense of humor!

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08 May 2010
2 Comments

A Miracle

After 18 months of no voice and trying everything my doctors knew to try, I was told I wasn’t going to get my voice back. My doctor suggested I go on disability.  Dennis and I met with my boss and he said “you can’t afford that. You just keep coming in and inspiring us with your trying to work. I’ll keep paying you and keep your benefits”  How awesome was that? By then I had gone back to work as much as I could.  I whispered or sounded pretty horrible depending on what sound I could get out, but I was no longer really isolated. I still didn’t eat in public, but my positive attitude was back and I had joined Bible Study Fellowship on Thursdays and so was back in a formal Bible study which I had not been in for a number of years. It is amazing what being in God’s Word on a regular basis will do to your spirit! I didn’t realize that God was really working in my life, but He was. A lot of people commented on my attitude or happiness or joy that I seemed to have in spite of the voice. I found that I was sharing my faith more as a result. And it was so simple, flowed so easily because people asked me.

I still couldn’t accept my doctor’s diagnosis. No voice forever? So I took a page from James (New Testament) where it was if any are sick, you are to gather the elders and pastors together and they are to anoint the sick one with oil and then pray. I asked my pastors to do the same for me.  God is still in the business of miracles, because He gave me my voice back! It is huskier and lower pitched and I have to protect it with just how much I use it in a day, but I talk with a “normal” voice! My doctor couldn’t believe it when I went back to him, but he is a believer and knows a miracle when he sees one! He says I am a walking, talking miracle!

The coolest thing is that this has only added to my story of God’s care for me. Those who know me and who have gone through this with me know absolutely that there is no medical basis for me to be able to speak, but I do.  I can’t sing anymore though and I miss it, but someday, I’ll be in the heavenly choir singing praises to the King.!

Posted in Bible study, christian, chronic fatigue, life stories, stroke, surviving major health issues, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , ,
08 May 2010

Life After a Stroke

I didn’t really get the stroke diagnosis for about 3 months. I was referred to a Throat and Voice Specialist and after examining me, he asked me to see a neurologist. He didn’t explain the why of that thoroughly, just said that I might have some muscle issues. Of course I couldn’t talk yet. He did tell me that the vocal chords were still paralyzed and in whispers I could tell him about my issues with eating. I could not eat out in public as I never knew when I would choke and literally throw everything back up. These issues concerned him too and so pretty quickly I got in to see a new neurologist. This one specialized in neuromuscular diseases. WOW, that’s a death sentence. I went through all the testing over a six week time period and that included Christmas time. I’ll never forget my sister Marilou came to me and said, we are going to pray you through this. I just won’t accept such a diagnosis and can’t loose you! Thus began our weekly praying together. This is a whole different subject in itself and one day I’ll write about it, but here it is almost 5 years later and we are still praying together weekly.

So you know that since I am still alive, I didn’t have any of the neuromuscular diseases, but I had suffered a stroke. Back to the voice doctor, he planned surgery to move my vocal chords closer together, which would loosen them up. I also started speech therapy two to three times a week. Because I was so fatigued, he ordered a sleep study and we found that I stop breathing 86 times an hour! No wonder I was so tired!  So he ordered a BiPap machine which I wear at night that forces air down my nose and throat. I hate wearing it, but I hate being so tired more. We decided to try for the surgery which could fix the problem, but for me it didn’t work.

All this time, I spoke in whispers or if I forced it, I sounded like I had the worst case of laryngitis you’ve ever heard. I wasn’t really working. How can you be a recruiter without a voice? But occasionally a local client would call with a need and my wonderful office would rally and find a candidate for me.  I slept a lot and really withdrew a lot. If you knew me, you’d know  that was just not me! But with not being able to communicate, not being able to eat or drink in public–I just felt cut off from everything.

About this time, my husband brought me home a puppy one day. He looked like a Benji dog-was supposed to be a terrier/poodle mix who would only grow to 15lbs at most. We named him Kirby because my husband said he was a curbstone setter. Having a puppy really got me up and out of bed. To potty train a puppy you have to be viligant. He would let me stay in the bed for a 2 hour nap, but then he’d bark at me to get up-even if it was to the sofa. We took walks in the afternoon and I got stronger. No voice, but the rest of my body was beginning to heal.

Posted in cervical fusions, christian, chronic fatigue, life stories, sleep apnea, stroke, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , | Leave a Comment
02 May 2010

These Last Nine Months

I noticed today that my love of cooking and planning a good dinner has come back to me! I’ve shared some recipes previously.  This is amazing because up until the last 3 or 4 weeks, my husband has been planning, cooking and serving us. Not that this was a bad thing, but he has his basic things he can fix- I like a lot of variety with a lot of fresh vegetables. As I have said before, we eat mostly fish and some chicken and occasionally some beef. Every now and then, I”ve just got to have a cheeseburger and no one does them better than Dennis! Even Chili’s can’t beat him and they are good! Besides hamburgers, he still needs the occasional pot roast, or smothered steak with peppers and onions. But he has been really good to accept all the fish and seafood we’ve been having. I’m lucky he likes it as much as I do.

I’ve also started back at keeping my house. Cleaning up as I see a room that needs it, I feel like I have been rejuvenated or re-born. This afternoon, I worked at cleaning up my office. Now I think that a clean desk is the sign of a sick mind, so you know it really needed attention, but it was good to put some things away and reorganize others. I am back working full time now and enjoying it more than ever! That is really something considering I ‘ve been doing this since 1979!

God is so good though to keep my business bright and fresh. I never know who I’ll speak with that day or where they will be located. It is amazing that by praying over my work, I literally watch God bring the right people to me out of the hundreds I might have spoken with! Some are just so perfect that I could never have arranged  all of the circumstances, the backgrounds of firm and candidate and ultimately their joined goals like God can! I wonder how I ever did this without praying over my work before I started a search. He certainly blessed me in spite of me!

So what happens next? I know I am not completely headache free. That probably means more nerve blocks in my future, but at least they are working for longer periods now. I know I have cataracts to get taken care of, but God willing nothing else major!

Posted in christian, chronic fatigue, chronic pain, Creativity, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , | Leave a Comment
13 Apr 2010

Shrimp Pasta Extradonaire

Depending on how many people you want to serve-about a half lb per person of shrimp, then tailor how much of the veggies, etc you add. It’s all relative!

Shrimp- cleaned and deveined

yellow summer squash, cut into small bite size pieces

zucchini squash, cut into small bite size pieces

red and green peppers cut into small bite size pieces

about 1/4 lb sliced mushrooms

half a bunch of green onions sliced thinly

2-3 cloves of garlic, finely chopped or use a garlic press

One jar of Alfredo sauce

white wine to taste

cooked whole wheat pasta-amount depending on how many to serve

Freshly grated parmesan cheese

Saute’  onions, then add garlic and mushrooms, then peppers. Cook until tender. Add squash, cook until tender.

Add Alfredo sauce to the veggies and then add a little white wine to sauce so it is not quite so thick. Again to taste.

When it tastes great, add the shrimp for just 3 minutes, until they turn pink.  Immediately take off of heat.

Serve pasta and then add the shrimp alfredo sauce. Add parmesan cheese.

Can be served with salad and baguette of bread.

Enjoy!

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04 Apr 2010
1 Comment

New Fish and Salsa Recipe

My anti-inflamatory diet has a lot of fish and seafood as ingredients. I needed to find something more interesting for Tilapia than just sautéing it or oven baking it! Since fruit is also a large part of this diet, I decided to put the two together! To do that, I looked through lot’s of fruit and fish/fruit salsa recipes and decided to combine and add as I had. Hope you enjoy!

1-to 1 /2 lbs of Tilapia

salt and pepper and garlic powder to taste over the fish

Place fish in pan lined with foil. Make the salsa:

1/3 chopped papaya

1 chopped mango

1/2 of banana pepper, seeded and diced

1/3 of small red onion diced or 1/4 if you don’t like a lot of raw onion

1/4 of small hot pepper (any kind) minus seeds and diced, again to taste

pineapple chunks-maybe a 1/4 cup

watermelon chunks-maybe a 1/4 cup

cilantro, just a few finely chopped leaves

juice of one lemon/strained

juice of one lime/strained

Mix all together and then pour over fish. Cover tightly with second layer of foil and cook 20 min @ 400 degrees.

I have also tried this salsa as a side dish with fish-so raw, not cooked. It is awesome! I have upped the amounts so that I make more at a time. It keeps well in the fridge, so if you have fish twice a wk, you’ve got it made already! It seems to get better with age.

This is great with brown rice made with either vegetable or chicken stock instead of water and whatever greens you’d like to serve.

 Read my blog at CindyFrenchblog and find out why I need this diet and how eating right helps!

Posted in rheumatoid arthritis, Uncategorized and tagged ,
06 Mar 2010

A Little Backwards…

In thinking back to previous years and incidents that have defined my life, I realize that I am either defined by the year’s medical crisis, a new baby, or God’s specific calling and teaching. The last specific time I wrote about was the neck surgery in 1995. I had another fusion in 1997 and again in 2005. I actually have really good motion for my head in spite of the fusions. Of course, I worked very hard in physical therapy. Again, I was working, leading a successful office for MRI. I loved what I did and felt such a responsibility-to my staff-to my clients-and to my candidates. Over the course of the 90′s I was very privileged to be in the top ten status with our company. I was very thankful as I did have different physical obstacles to overcome, but knew that they didn’t interfere with the business. On the other hand, what might we have accomplished without my constant medical crisis’?

 The next few years, I suffered my first serious asthma attack which I barely survived and an aspergillus fungus in my sinus that was slowly killing me! These are such weird, off the wall ailments. Then there was RSD (reflex sympathetic dystrophy) in my back and a strange infection in my breasts after having more reconstructive work done. I look back at all this and I am amazed:  1. that I kept having so much stuff happen to my body  2. that they were strange, unusual ailments  3. except for God’s intervention I wouldn’t be here today.

Posted in aspergillus fungus, asthma, cervical fusions, christian, chronic fatigue, chronic pain, life stories, surviving major health issues, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment
06 Mar 2010

And One More Thing!

Just when I thought I might be getting better–I’m not.  The last two days, I have worked-had full days as a matter of fact, but the headache is once again getting worse. I am back to 2 percocet at a time again and I am having breakthrough nausea even with the compezine. 

I went to the gastroenterologist this morning after a week of worsening heart burn. It has gotten down to where much of what I eat and drink burns me. The thought is that six months of daily vomiting could have damaged my existing hiatal hernia further or started an ulcer. I am scheduled for an endoscopy next week to see. In the meantime, I am taking another drug-this one for Reflux.

My asthma is better and I am tapering down my steroid dosage. Still, looking at my round face, I can tell the side effects! In three weeks, I’ll take the “gold standard for diabetes testing” so they can tell me I have diabetes! I mean it, have you every heard of anyone that had so much wrong with their body? I honestly don’t know if I am just wearing out my parts or if maybe something something so systemic-like diabetes-or my asthma-is the culprit! I guess I will be finding out!

All these feelings after such a precious time Wednesday night with my pastors! I did hope for an instant miracle, but I can see that this is not to be, at least for right now. Still as I re-read the devotional sent to me last year and which I saved, I continue to be reminded that God is not punishing me. I do believe He is using all this to prune me, but also to touch those others that come into my sphere who are also sufferning. Every day there is just one someone who needs to hear Jesus’ story and how it’s impacted my life and can impact them as well.

Posted in brain tumor, christian, chronic fatigue, chronic pain, diabetes, life stories, parietal foriminas, Suffering loss, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a Comment
06 Dec 2009

I Keep Dodging Bullets!

Thanksgiving was good but interesting. Some of my family was here and that was wonderful. Personally however, I continued to go downhill. Several times, I thought we would go to the ER, but then things would settle down and I would put it off. I guess the good thing was I didn’t gain that 5 lbs that a lot of people do.

On Monday, we visited my doctor, who insisted that I go right to the ER. I was admitted and they began all their tests. I think they first wanted to rule out a stroke or TIA, but I knew it was simply my head again. It took all of Tuesday for the doctors to confab again. It turns out that my first angiogram-done at another hospital-completely missed the area of the original tumor from where my pain was originating. So, they did another one Wednesday and I was diagnosed with occipital neuropathy. Of course my internet research savvy kids said this was exactly all my symptoms! It even described my pain better than I did. (I had used screwdrivers digging in my head as a description.) The temporary solution to this is nerve blocks into the occipital nerves-both of mine since both sides of my head are inflamed. The permanent approach is to cut the nerves or to strip them down. I don’t know which will be best for me and hope to find out next week. I’d like to get all this done before Christmas! I really want to go to Atlanta for Christmas with my family!

So what am I learning through all this? I tell you one thing-I had such a hard time with this pain, yet I kept thinking about Christ’s suffering and knew it was so much worse…I couldn’t imagine as I could hardly stand it sometimes. I know I will be able to better understand others’ pain as I know without a doubt that God will bring those people into my sphere in the near future.  

I am also even more appreciative than ever of my sweet husband. He was with me through think and then every day. I also am aware of answered prayer! I know this diagnosis could have been so much worse, but I believe that with people praying on my behalf, God has answered in a way that is not nothing at all, but at least is fixable. Without praying people, I might be dead today. I am so aware of those prayers! And so very, very thankful.

So, I’ll be back to play another day! Blessings!

Posted in brain tumor, cervical fusions, christian, chronic pain, life stories, occipital neuropathy, surviving major health issues, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , | Leave a Comment
23 Nov 2009
1 Comment

I Am So Thankful

I spent the morning catching up on my sleep after my interesting stay at the hospital. After checking further, the pharmacist should have known that morphine and dilaudid were related and that I would be in danger of an allergic reaction!! I will be much more careful in the future before taking new drugs!

We are having Thanksgiving here-for probably the last time-as we do hope to sell the house and go smaller next year. I spent the afternoon setting my table-ironing the linens, polishing silver, placing the china, silver and crystal. I used a large metal “horn” that I have and placed all colors and sizes of gourds in it for my centerpiece. For candles,  I got out tiny little turkey candle holders for slim tall tapers. My table is white, red and gold (yellow) and so pretty!

Dennis finished the girls’ special Christmas presents and then helped me by doing the final grocery shopping for things we didn’t/couldn’t get yesterday. And then, he cleaned my ovens!! I have never heard of a husband that would clean an oven-but there he was scrubbing away so that I would not hurt my hands any further! What a wonderful, special man I am married to! I know that Jesus is taking note of all Dennis does for me-he has to have the most wonderful for jewels for his crown in heaven! All I could do was stand there and cry and thank God for him.

This certainly is not all that Dennis does for us, for our home.  He completely takes care of the laundry,  nine times out of ten, he cooks and cleans up! When I cook,  he cleans up. He takes care of our home both inside and out-whatever he can do to free me to work or to rest-whatever I need at the time.  He also chauffeurs me around,  as much of the time lately,  I can’t drive.  He takes our puppy Max and a book and they wait for me to finish a meeting or an appointment.

This week as a lot of my family comes to join us-I look back over the last year and all that has transpired. I see so much more good than bad-regardless of the financial struggles-the day by day dependence and growing relationship with my Heavenly Father has taken precedence over everything else I think about or do.  In every situation, I find myself thinking “what’s the lesson here?” or “what is God doing ?” or “who am I to share all this with?”  My continuing Bible study with BSF and how what I learn intertwines with my GriefShare Ministry as well as daily devotionals that I read or are sent to me,  continue to amaze me as I know that is my Father speaking directly to me and my circumstances.

So, regardless of what I am dealing with physically, or financially–I feel tremendously thankful and blessed- I truly have everything that gives one joy and peace.

Posted in brain tumor, christian, chronic fatigue, chronic pain, dural arteriovenous fistulas, GriefShare, life stories, rheumatoid arthritis, sharing loss of loved ones, Suffering loss, surviving major health issues, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , , , , , ,

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