CindyFrench-stranger than fiction stories

Saturday-dealing with a benign tumor

This past week I saw a general surgeon for a benign tumor (a lipoma) that is situated at the crown of my head. It had popped up in the last 3 wks and was pretty painful. After seeing my primary doctor, who ordered an MRI, I then saw a neurologist, who referred me to a dermatologist! The thing is in my scalp skin, not invasive into the skull.

The dermatologist did a biopsy, stitched it up, and told me to come back  in 10 days. I got the lipoma diagnosis on Monday. The only problem is that lipomas keep on growing. If they aren’t completely cut out, they come back! They are supposed to be slow growing and not painful, but of course MY Lipoma defies the norm!

I met with a great general surgeon who explained what it will mean to cut this much tissue out of my scalp. Not a pretty description. He also wanted me to consult with my neurosurgeon before going further. I am scheduled to see him on the 24th if not sooner-and I do hope it is sooner. It seems by the pain and feeling the edges of the tumor that it has grown quite a bit since Wednesday.

So my first feelings on Monday were-not again, why me?, I can’t afford to be away from work long, what in the world is God thinking? Why is He allowing this-one more thing to happen to me? I cried, I yelled at Him! I know that with every experience I have had He has brought someone into my life to share that experience and have complete understanding of how he/she feels! But this time, this time, I really didn’t want to do that either! I told the Lord to stop this! It isn’t fair that I have to hurt to share understanding, my faith, my God. I share with the people that come into my sphere every day. That should be enough!

I have learned the hard way not to stay mad at God for long. After a good cry, I opened my Bible to the Psalms. Once again, there was comfort and promise for His best for me. I was reminded again of all that He has provided and cared for and done for me all through the years. I know He is not going to stop now.

What was amazing was my first 2 calls the next day! Of course they would be people with brain tumors! At least mine is not in my brain! Something to be thankful for. But as we talked and shared, I knew that God was once again, doing His thing, helping me help someone else. In fact, after the calls, I raised my hands in the air and said, “ok God, I get it, I get it.”

So while I continue to work through this new challenge, I ask for YOUR prayers for me. That I will not be a complainer, but a good patient, always mindful that it could be worse.